by Cheri E. Mode
My new, young dental hygienist told my brother, the dentist, that I scared her.
I was, well, shocked beyond shocked. OMG. A kind, funny, focused person like me–petite, interested, interesting, conversant, curious, and focused (did I say that already?) person SCARED her?
She did not tell me face-to page-boy, owl-eyed face.
No, scared people rarely do that; rather, they tell someone else.
The next visit to the hygienist, I said, ” I hear you are afraid of me. Why?”
To her credit, she stepped into the picture like an animated Hun.
“Have you seen The Incredibles movie? “she asked, and then offered her reasoning as a doctoral student would do to the committee of which it is so petrified.
“Do you know who Edna Mode is? From The Incredibles?” and with that, whipped out her cell phone and produced a picture of a little woman dressed in a black dress, black tights and sporting large round black specs.”
“No, I have not seen The Incredibles, ” I admitted, already making plans with Netflix for the night.
“Well, Cheri, Edna is focused and doesn’t take any S_ _ _ from anyone,” she stated so matter-of-factly that I clamped down on the whirling whizzy tool she was using to polish my focused white teeth.
“So that I may better understand you, am I correct in saying that you are not afraid of people who are scattered and malleable? ” I said, in between spitting in the bowl.
I watched The Incredibles, studied Edna Mode, and returned to the dental office, dressed in black, with a pencil behind my ear and a spring in my step.
As the hygeniest entered the waiting room to call her next incredible patient (me), I jumped out from behind the fish tank, just to the left of the coffee machine, and before the coffee table filled with dental implant magazines covering an occasion USC Trojan sports schedule.
” Are you still afraid of me?” I teased, ” and to her point I stated, “Don’t you see that Edna Mode is perhaps the best character in The Incredibles? She’s not scary at all! Rather, she has opinions, a work ethic, and a soul.”
(Let it be said here that Edna Mode, I understand, is patterned after the Hollywood Legend of fashion design, Edith Head)