Are you ready for burglars at your home?

by cheri

I miss my deceased Rottweilers, Elsa and Udo, who both passed into guard-dog eternity nine years ago and are buried across the creek.  Especially after last night.

Udo looked as if a cast-iron skillet had hit him squarely in the face. Over 120 pounds,his broad black  forehead, dark skeptical eyes, and vice-grip jaw enabled him to just look at people peering into our property, gawking or spying, and create quite an impression. Most did not linger.

He was my protector at night when I was alone. Like a stealth black doormat, he slept and guarded our front door and me, his Alpha.

Elsa, too, was a guard dog for the ages. Flawed, with long hair and a disfiguring under-bite, she was perhaps the most focused dog I have ever owned.

Elsa and Udo are just memories, replaced by my sweet Labrador who does bark, but whose lovely blond face and wagging tale, like a rudder, are far from intimidating. My alarm system is now my warning dog.

I will give the Lab credit last night, for when she heard a car idling on the road by our property, she launched into a protective deep-throated growl which developed into rapid-fire barking.

For my part, alone, as my husband was out-of-town, I must commend myself for keeping my wits. Listening to my husband’s long-distance directions, I loaded my 38 caliber hand gun, my father’s, with six bullets. I only wish I had thought to step outside, yell at the gate invaders, and shoot into the night sky. That would have been a deterrent. I also wish I had been fully comfortable with my 9mm Beretta automatic hand gun. That will be my May goal.

I  turned on the outside spot lights at my husband’s suggestion, on his cell phone far away, angry at the circumstances and feeling helpless to do anything.

I had no idea what “gate tamper” meant when my phone began chirping as if I had a gate visitor. No gate visitor in the black of night. Just a gate tamperer. Two tamperers, intent on opening our gate, I am sure, to burglarize a house they thought was vacant.

Fully armed, I called 911.

Two of America’s finest arrived to assess the circumstances (and they were cute, as my mother would say…)

Let’s hope that our video camera, which the dumb-asses did not see hidden in the sycamore tree, yields good evidence. I already know the make of the car.

It’s important to have a plan for circumstances like this. Do you?





About Cheri

Writer, artist, cable television host, grandmother to four!
This entry was posted in Education, Life and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

22 Responses to Are you ready for burglars at your home?

  1. Richard says:

    Make sure you are safe. Good people are scarce.

    We have an alarm system which deters.

    How effective this will be against the revolutionary hordes armed with machetes remains to be seen. I note that ‘machete’ is derived from the 15th Century Spanish, macho, meaning ‘hammer’. Combined with a sickle, what price all the bells and whistles?

  2. Cheri says:

    Thanks Richard! Nothing (even would-be burglars) would keep me from traveling to London to see you and Glenys. Nothing. Excellent (and very clever comment, as usual) observation. We believe that things will only get worse here in the US; class warfare, as initiated by our feckless president, has enlivened the masses to avoid work and take up litigation. That’s why, here on the Rancho, we are overly armed. Whenever Barack Obama opens his mouth about gun control, the NRA reports gun sales through the roof. My father, a Scoop Jackson Democrat, willed us most of his guns, so we had a head start. And thank you for your wishes. I am safe. Feisty, as usual. Next time, any potential thieves better watch their backs. This week, as you know, has been a challenge for me.

  3. Sharon says:

    Nice assessment, girlfriend! The only way Tikka would bark, would be if the invaders had a vacuum cleaner! Way to go vicious Lab:-)

    Love you and our time to catch up!


    • Cheri says:

      You, my strong and able friend (not to mention so concerned about me), were the salve I needed this morning. Thanks for buying me lunch and treating me to your loving presence. It wasn’t enough time but after your next grandchild is born, we will toast his birth with Rombauer!

  4. Christopher says:

    A woman alone on a large property is always especially vulnerable. Do you have a friend (or friends) who could stay with you whenever your husband is out-of-town?

  5. I have already told you my suggestion. Christopher’s suggestion is also good.

  6. wkkortas says:

    My dog goes nuts at chimpmunks and has no clue where the good silverware and bank books are, so it’s a start.

    • Cheri says:

      Funny! My dog is afraid of the leaf blower. While she ignores wild turkeys on our front porch, she is ultra-concerned about cars idling up by our gate. Good for her!

  7. I think I have a new nickname for you. Annie Oakley. I am glad to know you are safe.

    • Cheri says:

      More people emailed me off the blog to tell me I should have used a shotgun. I have one of those too, but at 105 pounds, I am kicked backward when I shoot it.

  8. Cyberquill says:

    You may want to post at your gate the picture of that beheaded rattlesnake, captioned “I trespassed here.”

    • Cheri says:

      I wish I were as clever as you.

      We are having 3 more cameras installed at the gate level, including one that captures license plate numbers. I’ve already spent several hours watching the video of the would-be break- in and the getaway, I can see that having 4 cameras will take me back to those days in the 60’s when I worked in loss prevention at the local Mervyn’s store.

      God forbid that Wrangler should come up the road again. My husband is angry about this.

      • Cyberquill says:

        How do you know these people were would-be burglars and not some couple who, having partied a bit too hard, mistook your gate for theirs and only realized their mistake when the spotlights came on?

  9. Cheri says:

    Oh, I wish spotlights had come on. That was part of the problem: the motion detectors and lights were not working. I wish our neighbors might have been at the wrong gate. Our neighbors are Buddhists who meditate constantly and/or an 88-year-old-woman who stays at home. These were bad guys. God forbid they should come by again. I am a different person.

    • Cyberquill says:

      Uh-oh. No more Mrs Nice Block. The gloves are off. Merely dousing an intruder with ammonia and whopping his conk off with a shovel was the former, more amiable you. No uninvited visitor will get off this lightly ever again.

      • Cheri says:

        No, No More Mrs. Nice Block, is right. (Pretty funny, Cy). Shows to go you how one miserable experience can reap positive change.

  10. Brighid says:

    Good to read that you are more prepared. They have home defense shotguns for small people, I would recommend getting one and learn how to use it, well.
    Be safe, I don’t want anything happening to you!

  11. Cheri says:

    Thank you. Are you thinking about a 20 gauge shotgun? I have one that was especially tailored to my arm size, etc. I have been told that is what I should have fired. Is that right?

  12. shoreacres says:

    There’s a sign that shows up here and there in my part of the country: “Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.”

    A friend of mine who lives in the middle of Houston keeps a full-body silhouette target next to her back door, with a nice, tight circle right around the location of the heart. She says it gives people pause. Me? i carry a concealed weapon that’s done well for me three different times. It turns out I’m a screamer — and not just a screamer, but a loud, piercing, sustained screamer. When I lived in Berkeley, and found a dude happily letting himself in my living room with a crowbar, my scream sent him flying over a 5′ concrete block wall. It was very satisfying.

    Being out in the country carries some additional risks. I vote for the 20 gauge.

  13. Cheri says:

    Well!! Thank you for this comment. We have a board that is nailed to a pine tree that used to say, Beware of Big Dogs. Ten years have passed since the Big Dogs died. I’ve been thinking about what to write on that board for several years. The quotation above would be perfect (if I can paint all the words on the size of this sign). Yes, the vote has been uninamous for the 20-gauge. I’ll let everyone know after I take my first lesson on Tuesday.
    And yes, I am aware of the risks living up here. The Bay Area has changed since you were in Berkeley many years ago. People up to no good are leaving urban areas to troll for “stuff” wherever they might be able to steal it…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s